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  • Therapy, Personal Growth & Self Knowledge …Really?

    personal growth

    Many speak about therapy and/or case studies as a route to personal growth and self knowledge, but can it really deliver? That depends a lot on the kind of therapy, the attitude of the person undertaking it, and the knowledge and attitude of the therapist.

    The famous passage quoted below illustrates this very well.

    Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

    Chapter 1

    I walk down the street.

    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

    I fall in.

    I am lost … I am helpless.

    It isn’t my fault.

    It takes forever to find a way out.

    Chapter 2

    I walk down the same street.

    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

    I pretend I don’t see it.

    I fall in again.

    I can’t believe I am in the same place.

    But, it isn’t my fault.

    It still takes a long time to get out.

    Chapter 3

    I walk down the same street.

    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

    I see it is there.

    I still fall in … it’s a habit.

    My eyes are open.

    I know where I am.

    It is my fault.

    I get out immediately.

    Chapter 4

    I walk down the same street.

    There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

    I walk around it.

    Chapter 5

    I walk down another street.

    from Portia Nelson, There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk , © Portia Nelson 1993

    The good outcome in this story is due to three things.

    1) Reflection

    The author of the poem has the courage to look at what is going on in her life.  Not at first, because panic and confusion are in the driver’s seat.  But eventually, she faces the questions: “What is going on?’, “What caused this?”  And, actually, at an even more basic level, she’s able to admit that “I’m in a hole!”

    2) Willingness to Honestly Look at Oneself

    Gradually, the poem’s author is able to put down her knee-jerk self defense, and to clearly see her role in creating this situation.  She is able to do this with compassionate self acceptance.

    3) Willingness to Put Insights Into Action

    Once she has these insights, she acts on them and experiences personal growth.

    Very often, these three steps need the fertile ground, compassion and support of the right therapy to best come into being.

     Brian Collinson, Psychotherapist & Jungian Analyst | Oakville, Burlington and Mississauga Ontario

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    PHOTO: © All rights reserved by mfriel81
    © 2011 Brian Collinson
    2238 Constance Drive, Oakville, Ontario (near Mississauga)

     

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